there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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