peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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