Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
