"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
