Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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