we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
