Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
