I just saw a hot homeless man
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
