i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Randomize
