Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
