So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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