no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
two words: eviction party
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize
