she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I think my vagina is haunted
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
