I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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