is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
