Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
