We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
