their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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