when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I'm too high and old for this...
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
