My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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