hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
