Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
