did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I am mentally ready for anal.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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