Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Randomize
