so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
