Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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