My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
