i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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