so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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