they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
