I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
if only i could text you this smell
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Hippo gnu deer
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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