jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
