Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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