I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
