dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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