Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
