So drunk its hurt
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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