So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
