idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
