I just pynch a tree in the face
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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