My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Randomize
