i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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