it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
