so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
