So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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