In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
