you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
