I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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