I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize