i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Randomize
