we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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